Episode 79: Healing Sister Wounds & Mother Wounds

In this episode, Emily shares an excerpt from inside her EMERGE Mastermind so you see how she sets expectations and opens group spaces.

 It is showing up in your bank account. It is showing up in the way that you interact in the world. This is all interconnected. So even if you don't give a crap about your inner child or your sister wounds or your mother wounds, if you care about making money and if you care about having more impact and you care about your visibility and your amplification of your message in the world, then you should care about healing these.

Hello, beautiful souls. Today's episode is so, so good. And before we jump in, I have some exciting views to share. If you've ever wondered where you're blocking money, this is for you. I've created a free quiz to diagnose your money wounds so you can heal them and unblock yourself to receive more money. Just go to money woundsquiz.com and answer six quick questions to get your insanely accurate and app results. And if you're loving my vibe and want to work one on one to call in more feminine energy wealth, I would love to hear from you. You can shoot me a DM on social media or go to emilywilcox.com to learn more.

Hi guys. Welcome back to the show. I am actually getting ready to go to a fall festival at my son's preschool, so, All the mamas who are listening know that this is a busy time of year, this weekend has all kinds of Halloween activities and festivities and add on top of that, multiple soccer games and a softball game, and a best friend's birthday party, and just a lot going on.

We also have a house guest coming in tonight too, so never a dull moment in my world. I'm here for it. And actually next week, Wednesday is a full day photo shoot. Like we're talking full day, 15 outfits, three different locations, a bunch of shots including Jeff and the kids. So it is an all-out production and I feel like the busyness of the weekend is gonna carry me into next week.

And that photo shoot's gonna be here before we know it. So I'm sort of equal parts anticipation and kind of can't wait to have it behind me just. It feels like so much coordination. And of course, our normally like sunny and warm weather here in Southern California is looking questionable for next Wednesday, so it's looking like it might be cold and rainy.

So we may have to call some audibles on some of the outfits and some of the shoot locations. But the other thing is we really don't get that much rain. So it could be that it's all BS or that it all happens earlier in the day before the shoot. It's like another lesson in surrender. It's like the best-laid plans are great and we just have to surrender whatever happens to the highest good and trust that it's all working out for us.

So there's nothing that I can do to change any of it. And so why be in resistance to it? That is my philosophy. Okay, so you're gonna love today's show. It's a quick one, and what it actually is a riff. That I did to open up a Mastermind space. So there are a lot of coaches that don't run Masterminds at all, or only do it much later into their coaching career because the thing with masterminds is that although they are incredibly transformative spaces, they are highly scalable offers.

They open up an entirely different can of worms around the interplay and the inter dynamic of being in a group environment. And so likewise, when you put yourself into a mastermind, This is something that my mentor Melanie says that I just love. She's like, it will trigger you into excellence. You will be like, "I don't like her. She celebrates too much. Hmm, I don't like this other one, because she takes up so much space. She drops eight Voxers in a day, and then I don't feel like there's enough space for me to get my question answered, and you might feel. Hmm. So and so is the favorite of the coach."  All of this inner child comes up because it's gosh, who didn't have a childhood that was at least somewhat defined by a sibling rivalry or noticing that so and so got more than you got, and trying to figure out fairness and trying to figure out how you measured up with your parents and who was mom's favorite and who was dad's favorite, and what did you have to do to be the favorite.

All of that still lives inside of us.  And it just may not come out to play very often, and so you might be feeling like, Emily, I don't know what you're talking about. I never feel that way. Well, let me ask you, when was the last time you put yourself into a high-level mastermind? Because I promise you, all of my clients are like, yeah, I really didn't resonate when you talked about sister wounds and mother wounds.

But sure enough, here they are and it is something that we often don't know about ourselves, and then it will. And it is so powerful when it comes up because you get to heal it, and I promise you it's not just like, oh, do I really need to heal the inner child version of me that wanted to be mom's favorite?

Listen, it is showing up in your bank account. It is showing up in the way that you interact in the world. This is all interconnected. So even if you don't give a crap about your inner child or your sister wounds or your mother wounds, if you care about making money and if you care about having more impact and you care about your visibility and your amplification of your message in the world, then you should care about healing these.

So when I open up mastermind spaces, I like to let people know in advance that this might happen, what they might be feeling and what to do with that. Because otherwise it can be tricky to name it after the fact or when someone's in the trigger. You're gonna hear my little riff on that. If you're someone that holds group spaces, I know that this is gonna be so impactful for you and that you'll probably be taking notes so that you can better set expectations and better open up the group spaces that you hold.

And if you're someone who's been in a mastermind before or who's thought about joining one, this is gonna be so helpful for you just to imagine yourself in those spaces and how you would handle it, and maybe it might make you think about joining a high level mastermind. PS my high level mastermind. The becoming is absolutely fantastic and has some space available.

So without further ado, I will let you listen to my actual riff inside of the Emerge Mastermind when I opened it. Enjoy. I've been in Masterminds up to a $10,000 a month investment, and I didn't make every call and I didn't always show up in Voxer. I didn't always like use all the things. And we can sort of make that a disempowering thing where it feels like scarcity and it's like, oh my gosh, I'm not extracting all the value , or we can choose to be in our power about it and say like, you know what? This is actually like kind of a badass move that I know I have it available to me. I know I can plug into it and I'm choosing and I'm prioritizing this other thing. It's like being at the most beautiful buffet, and it's like the worst thing we can do at a luxury buffet is decide that we have to completely dishonor our bodies and stuff, our faces until we feel disgusting because we have to extract the value out of it. Right? So, what I notice is that when I'm receptive to it, the energetic exchange of being in these spaces is so valuable and really is a tangible part of the experience that we just get to be open to all the time, whether we're on every call, whether we ask a bunch of questions, or we just observe and absorb and get value from everyone else's questions.

So just really honor yourself in this experience. and. Masterminds tend to reveal to us the places where we wanna hide. We wanna shrink, we wanna compare. Mother wounds and sister wounds tend to come out in masterminds because we're just throwing ourselves into the fire. Mother wounds tend to come out when there's a person in, like a position of authority or a person that we look up to or we put on a pedestal. That could be a therapist, a coach, a boss. And the way it comes out often is like we're really seeking that person's approval. We really want their attention. And so if there's anything that is perceived as a slight or as, oh, so and so is the favorite, oh, she always asks them to share first, or she gives them more coaching than she gives me. She didn't respond on my Facebook post, but she responded on somebody else's. Like that really is this sweet little girl inside of us that's like trying to figure out like, does mom love me enough and am I okay and am I pleasing? And what do I have to do to get the attention and the approval and the love that I want?

And how come it's easier for my sister or my brother to get it and it's harder for me? And so, In those situations, we really want to dive to the depth of what's happening and not address it on the surface. Cuz the surface level would be like, Hey, how come you're not answering my coaching question? But it's like the deeper thing is, oh, can I give my inner child so much love? like she is really wanting attention and approval. Like, can I give that to her? Cause really I'm the source of approval that she needs and I'm the source of love that she needs. Sometimes that comes up, just mother wound stuff. And then the sister wound is the part of us that does not feel safe being really vulnerable in groups of other women.

And so sometimes that will be called like a witch wound. It's like the part of us that's like, okay, the thing that's really coming up for me is like the thing I really don't wanna share in this group of women. Like it just feels so unsafe. And so I really wanna invite you into like meeting yourself at that edge because when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and actually feel really held by other women, it just activates.

This superpower, like all of this amazing, incredible like tribal energy that actually is available for us, but because of lineage traumas and because of conditioning, like we've assumed the masculine energy of like, I'll go it alone. I'll just do the things and I'll shoulder it and I won't let anyone know that I'm struggling and I certainly won't say it out loud and receive.

So these are spaces where if that stuff comes up, I've found that it's actually really powerful to name it in the space. That is the most next-level move. Oh, I'm really feeling a sisterhood wound right now, and here's what I'm noticing, and just like asking for some love and support. Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. 

Before you go, I have something fun to share. Now, when you leave a review with a podcast on Apple, Spotify, or YouTube, take a quick screenshot and send it to hi@emilywilcox.com. You'll be entered into a drawing to win a free one-on-one Voxer Coaching Day with me and you help the show reach more. New listeners.

Such a win-win. I also invite you to follow me on Instagram at EM Makes Money and to jump into my free telegram community, The Money Club, which is linked in the show notes. Until next time, I'm sending you all the magic money vibes.