Episode 22: Making a Controversial Pivot When Your Lifelong Dreams Come True but Happiness Doesn’t Follow with Dr Morgan Anderson

Dr Morgan Anderson is a clinical psychologist and relationship coach. Dr Morgan is the creator of the E.S.L. (Empowered Secure Loved) relationship method that helps women get off the dating rollercoaster, raise their self worth, and attract the healthy relationship they’ve always wanted.
Connect with Morgan:
https://www.drmorgancoaching.com/
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Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmorgancoaching/
Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lets-get-vulnerable-relationship-and-dating-advice/id1496034764
Work with Emily:
Website: https://www.emilywilcox.com/work-with-me
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Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/em.makes.money
Money Wounds Quiz: https://www.emilywilcox.com/quiz
Send a DM to inquire about open coaching & masterminds or go to https://www.emilywilcox.com/products
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Transcript:
Dr. Morgan: Growing up in Montana and just within my family, there was a lot of like, you have to work really, really hard. And there also was this idea of, why would you ever want to earn more than like 50,000 a year? What would you even do with that money? So I think I felt guilt also about wanting to earn more. I oftentimes will find myself, like trying to deny that there was even financial desire. It's like, you know, I see this a lot in the heart-centered entrepreneurs space. It's just to help people like, It's to help people. And It's for you to support yourself with money and earn your worth. Right? So I would totally ignore that part. I had a terrible, terrible relationship with money for years and years and years, and it definitely impacted my business.
Emily: Were you aware that you had an unhealthy relationship with money or did it only kind of come into your awareness when you became an entrepreneur?
Dr. Morgan: I was aware. I mean so childhood just sharing some of that. I watched my dad go through bankruptcy. We lost our house. We were on food stamps and there was periods of my life where I had two outfits to wear. And that was itch, there from Goodwill. There was all of this, like fear, and scarcity. My parents taught my dad specifically talked about money when he shouldn't have, there was a lot of, like him talking about losing his job or losing the house. And just being exposed to money is scary at a very young age. And the, and that got hardwired to the point where I would just avoid. Even thinking about it, looking at it, it was like, swipe my card, hope there's money in the account. If it gets declined, just leave and shame. That's kind of where I was at.
So I knew that was bad, but I didn't know what to do about it.
Emily: Hello beautiful souls. Today's episode is so, so good. And before we jump in, I have some exciting news to share. If you've ever wondered where you're blocking money, this is for you. I've created a free quiz to diagnose your money wounds so you can heal them and unblock yourself to receive more money. Just go to money wounds, quiz.com and answer six quick questions to get your insanely accurate and potent results. And if you're loving my vibe and want to work one-on-one to call in more feminine energy wealth, I would love to hear from you. You can shoot me a DM on social media or go to Emily Wilcox.com to learn more.
Hey, Hey, I've got such a juicy episode for you today. Quickly before we dive in. Many of you have reached out to ask how we can work together. And I do have limited openings to work with me via one-on-one private coaching inside the rise mastermind, and I've actually even opened up a few spots for human design readings.
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All right, welcome back to the show. I'm super excited to have my friend, Dr. Morgan Anderson on the show. She's a clinical psychologist and relationship coach. She hosts the Let's Get Vulnerable podcast. And she's the creator of the ESL relationship method. She helps women break the toxic dating cycle, raise their self-worth and attract the healthy relationship they've always wanted. Morgan I'm so happy you're here welcome to the show.
Dr. Morgan: Hey Emily, thank you for having me such a pleasure. And I'm, I'm so glad you're doing this work and doing this podcast and really looking forward to our conversation.
Emily: Me too. And you, this is such a full circle moment because you are one of the people that I went to first, when, when I got the spiritual call to start this podcast, I'm like, okay, let me talk to Morgan, because I know that she has a super successful podcast that she really loves. And so I feel like you gave me so many practical tips that I've implemented. So, it's actually just super fun to have you on the show and be able to thank you publicly.
Dr. Morgan: I love that so much. And I will tell you, many people come to me for advice. Few people actually start a podcast. So I hope you can have a ton of gratitude to yourself for actually doing it. So many people don't, they want to, and they don't execute. So it's exciting for me to be like, she took the advice and she did it.
Emily: I did it totally. Somebody sent me like a, you know, a salesy kind of email about, like growing the audience on my podcast. And they said something about, like, "I see you've gotten past, like the eight episode mark, which is where most people quit". And I thought, like, well, I must be doing something right. If I'm now getting, like, spam emails.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: About how to grow the podcast, like I've made it.
Dr. Morgan: Those never stopped you just keep more, more.
Emily: I could only imagine. The volume only goes up.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: And does correlation to your success.
Dr. Morgan: Exactly. Yes. But no, I'm so excited for you.
Emily: Thank you. Thank you. So I'm so happy that you're here and that we can just start to riff on like all things, you know, entrepreneurship, women in business and money. You and I met. Gosh, probably over a year ago, maybe a year and a half ago in the burrow mastermind as, as I lovingly referred to it. I like to kind of hate on them a little bit, but I'm actually, so, so thankful for that mastermind. Just a lot of good business fundamentals. Also a lot of learning what I don't want to do, but most importantly, the relationships that especially us women built within that mastermind are just absolutely invaluable.
So, and at the time you were still seeing some private practice patients, right? As a clinical psychologist, but you had also built this successful coaching business where you were helping women really, like break out of toxic. Relationship patterns and get into, like incredible, healthy like loving relationships, probably with self and then with a romantic partner.
Dr. Morgan: Yes. Yes. All true. That I, I started out as a clinical psychologist. That was the route that I was gonna take from a very young age. I knew in middle school, I wanted to be a clinical psychologist, which is rare. Right? Most people don't know that early on, but then I did it and I built a private practice in La Jolla, beautiful. I was 10 minutes from the beach. I had amazing clients. I was, I had a wait list. People love seeing me and I was seeing 30 people a week and I was totally burned out. I should be just a static. I worked my whole life for this. I got a doctorate degree. I went into 300,000 plus dollars of debt to be where I'm at and I'm miserable and it was hard to be at that place. And then that's when I started the coaching business.
Emily: Isn't it so fascinating when part of our life path is basically. To give us everything we thought that we wanted so that we can learn that it wasn't actually the thing.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: So was it just where you burnt out because you felt like you were spending too much time working or was it actually even the type of work, like sitting on a couch or you know sitting with a patient on the couch in front of you for that many hours? It just wasn't what you thought it was gonna be.
Dr. Morgan: It's a really good question. I've thought about that because when we're burnt out, we want to understand why, what can we attribute it to? I really think that I was playing a role that I, you know, I was showing up how I thought I was supposed to essentially really value clinical psychotherapy and it was limiting how I wanted to show up.
You're really, you're holding space. You're a safe container. But in our ethical code, we're not supposed to give advice. We're not supposed to open up about who we are. We're not supposed to share our journey. We're taught in grad school to be a blank screen, to not share anything. And it was hurting my heart to continue to work that way. And simply just not serve people in the way that I, I knew that they needed to be served.
Emily: That is so fascinating. And I know that like, I want to dig deeper because I know that this sort of like shedding of identities or perhaps more aptly put like kind of stepping into this truer expression of you as a coach, like also meant. Kind of a grieving of the loss of the part of you that thought that you were gonna be a psychologist forever and spent so many years and so much money getting that training, which of course still helps you today, but it's, it was less about the skills and I think it was more about the identity. So can you speak more about that?
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely. So, being a trained psychologist, when you're in those circles, coaching is a dirty word. They're like, coaches just basically do what we do, but they don't have the training and they just call themselves coaches. But it's a bunch of BS. There were, there was a ton of judgment from my psychologist circle around what it meant to be a coach.
I even had psychologists reach out to me and tell me that it was illegal, that there would be legal action against me. If I became a coach, it's like all of this fear-mongering in the psychologist world. So I let that get way for a while. But then ultimately I knew just because it's new and different. That's why people are scared of it. So, I took action, consultant with lawyers, got all the information and I started my business but It was interesting. How do you go from being a psychologist to a coach? And I think what you realize that's like the identity is even bigger than that. I think of myself as a healer, as, you know, a thought leader as a change agent, like we put ourselves in these little boxes, but we're all so much bigger than those labels.
Emily: Absolutely. And you know, I got to witness behind the scenes when you were deciding to stop treating that last handful of patients. And it was like, you know, it was that last little bit of that old identity that was hanging on. And that last little bit of the backup plan, right? The really safe, the safe place to land. And you were like, I need to, like close that chapter.
Dr. Morgan: This is fascinating. And this of course relates to money. Right? So I know we're gonna talk about that, but the idea of, you know, my psychotherapy practice presented their traditional path, the stable quote, unquote path, the path that when I said what I did. My parents, my colleagues, my friends knew what it meant. Right? It was, like understood by people. Whereas this coaching business, I'm pretty sure a lot of my family still doesn't know what I do. I can't explain it. And I think it was like, just this, this awareness that I am an entrepreneur. I remember I had a lot of ups and downs in my business in the beginning in terms of revenue as we all do.
I had a really low month and I had hired a male salesperson to sell to women for a relationship coaching, big mistake. This guy had taken like 40 sales calls about close to any of them. And I remember just, like crying, I'm on the floor and I called a coach and he said to me, "Morgan, you're an entrepreneur, you'll figure it out". It was the first time I'd ever thought of myself as an entrepreneur, even though I'd been a business owner for a year, I hadn't made the identity shift to being an entrepreneur.
So I think what helped me the most was understanding the zone of genius principle. We have to be in the place that we enjoy the most, where we can add the most value to the world. And ultimately my psychotherapy practice was not that place. So taking on the entrepreneur identity, the healer identity and like fully embracing it.
Emily: I love it. And I think your business revenue really changed at that point too. I think that was a pretty pivotal shift of like energetically going all in.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely.
Emily: So let's just like, rewind on the money's timeline so that way we can understand it all in the context. So like when you had a full private practice in La Jolla, like with the waitlist, what were you making any year?
Dr. Morgan: Probably 80 to 95,000.
Emiky: Okay.
Dr. Morgan: So, like for me growing up in Montana.
Emily: How much would I have had to pay for an hour of your time?
Dr. Morgan: It depended because I had insurance clients. So there was that at the highest level 250 an hour.
Emily: Okay. Right. So there was a time when that would have been like the dream come true. Somebody gonna pay me 250 an hour, I'm gonna make like 80, a hundred grand a year. This is the stuff of dreams.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely. For the first, I remember, I mean, I was in grad school living off 16,000 a year. In student loan money. So going from that to like the ADK, who was that feeling of like, I've made it, you know, even though I had it internally, which I'm sure is like a whole other story, but sure. We'll get there.
Emily: Right, right. One of the funniest things about money to me is that, like the milestone never feels like how you think it's gonna feel.
Dr. Morgan: No. I can't tell you that I was any happier right. Where it's like, I expected. That money to just totally change my life. And it didn't.
Emily: So you start taking, I don't know, was it just like a few coaching clients on the side or what did those early days look like?
Dr. Morgan: So I was at dinner with my cousin and his wife, and I was like, I have this crazy idea. I think I wanna, like, start a coaching business. And she was like, okay, let's talk about it. And I told her what I wanted to do. That I kept noticing that in therapy, people would get all this awareness about their dating patterns, but then they didn't actually know how to transform and what to do to become who they wanted to.
So they know where they're at. They have awareness of point A. But they don't know how to get to point B. Right? So I saw this gap and I was like, I lay awake at night thinking about, I could help people get to point B and it's not out there. And she was like, well, let's do it. And she built my website with me. I kid you not Emily
my first coaching package was with a guy I literally was like posting myself everywhere. I would take anybody. It was this, like, guy entrepreneur dude. And it was like $600 for eight sessions, even less than I charged as a psychologist.
So, started there and then. I invested in my first business coach. And that's when my coaching business really changed. And she taught me about, billion offer, knowing your avatar, all those essentials and helped me launch my podcast. And then it started to whereI'd get like two clients a month and then maybe I get three clients a month, but I was never over five clients in the very beginning.
Emily: So from a revenue perspective, you're maybe pulling in what a few thousand a month from coaching.
Dr. Morgan: I was earning anywhere from 0 to 6K, was like an amazing month.
Emily: So at what point did you start scaling down the private practice to focus more on the coaching business?
Dr. Morgan: Honestly people don't realize this. I was full time, private practice for the first two years of my business. It wasn't until you saw me when, I mean it's been recent.
Emily: Well, I'm glad you shared that because that's my story too. I spent three years working full time while building, I mean, at the time I labeled it a side hustle, but really, you know, it was my heart and soul. It just took a while, right? To get to the level where I could leave that security. I was the breadwinner in our family. So I'm glad you share that because I think sometimes there's pressure to go all in and it's like, you can go all in energetically without having to, like pull the rug out from under yourself.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely. Absolutely. And I, I'm very grateful that I love psychotherapy. So it wasn't like I was showing up to a job I hated, I loved it. I just love building my business more. Is how I explain it to people. So, you know, there, there was that, but ultimately, gosh, I remember being a full-time private practice having 25 clients a week taking 60 sales calls in a month and coaching clients and recording podcasts. I had seasoned where I had no free time. I worked weekends. I worked 12 hour days. That's the real truth. Do you have to do it that way? No, but that's how I built it.
Emily: Well, and that also sounds to me like what I call the hard money wound. So.
Dr. Morgan: For sure.
Emily: When we have that subconscious wiring of more effort for more money, then it's like, okay. Then I'll do a 60 hour week. Could I do a 70 hour week? I wonder what the results would be like if I did that.
Dr. Morgan: And I think. So, I mean, growing up in Montana and just within my family, there was a lot of like, you have to work really, really hard. And there also was this idea of why would you ever want to earn more than like 50,000 a year? What would you even do with that money? So I think I felt guilt also. About wanting to earn more. I oftentimes find myself, like trying to deny that there was even financial desire. It's like, you know, I see this a lot in the heart-centered entrepreneurs space. It's just to help people like, It's to help people and it's for you to support yourself with money and earn your worth. Right? So I would totally ignore that part. I had a terrible, terrible relationship with money for years and years and years. And it definitely impacted my business.
Emily: Were you aware that you had an unhealthy relationship with money or did it only kind of come into your awareness when you became an entrepreneur?
Dr. Morgan: I was aware, I mean, so childhood just sharing some of that. I watched my dad go through bankruptcy. We lost our house. We were on food stamps. And there was periods of my life, where I had two outfits to wear. And that was itch, there from Goodwill. There was all of this like fear, scarcity. My parents taught my dad specifically talked about money when he shouldn't have, there was a lot of like him talking about losing his job or losing the house. And just being exposed to money is scary at a very young age. And the, and that got hardwired to the point where I would just avoid.
Even thinking about it, looking at it, it was like, swipe my card, hope there's money in the account. If it gets declined, like just leave and shame. That's kind of where I was at. So I knew that was bad, but I didn't know what to do about it. And it was survival. I think about my relationship with money. It was like a survival for your relationship.
Emily: And I wonder too, was there a feeling because of those childhood memories of like the money could go at any moment, like I could buy it.
Dr. Morgan: Well, it's this whole, it's scarcity mindset. You know, we know this and guess what? It was the same in my relationships with men, like this is all connected. The fear of yes If I get it, it's just going to be gone. So I would, I would have either the approach of like, well, I have it. I should just spend it cause I'm, I may not ever have it again.
So let me just do whatever I want and make these terrible decisions that didn't support me. Or I would go through phases where I wouldn't spend anything. And it was just like, okay, I'm gonna eat cans of tuna and black beans this week and that's it. So, it's like just all these extremes. I had to deal with my money stuff when I became an entrepreneur. Because what I realized, it wasn't just about me anymore. Have a team and everybody needs to get paid and I need to be a good steward of money. It's not just about me anymore. It's about the business. It's about many other people.
Emily: Did you notice that you were playing out some of those same patterns in your business?
Dr. Morgan: For sure. It definitely, I think. Gosh, just pull Lord. I mean, think about sales calls, like the level of desperation and fear that I had on my first sales calls. I cringe thinking about how those calls went. It was like, well, I'll do this or I'll do that. Or no, like, I can give you a discount or we'll do a payment plan that's spread out over 17 months and it'll be this about as like, oh my gosh, it was bad. So it's definitely a sabotage my business in the beginning.
Emily: Sales calls are so wild because it's like, we're simultaneously attaching our worth to whether they say yes or no.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: So it's like our worthiness is on the line, which makes us want to do all of those crazy gymnastics to get a yes. And then at the same time, we project all of our weird money stories onto this potential client. So like, they may not have a fear of spending that money, but we're almost, like scared for them or whatever. That's just like one example, but.
Dr. Morgan: No, It's so true. I was so doing that, It's bizarre. So I think, I mean, I got in the mastermind, when you were referring to and someone had wrecked. Cause I, I actually acknowledged, I was like, I have a problem with money. It's not necessarily making it. I had gotten pretty good at making it. I had a problem keeping it like every time I would get it, either crazy expenses would come up or there'd be something I'd have to pay or I'd go spend it on something I didn't even want. I was just, I couldn't hold onto it because I didn't, it's identity. Right? I didn't see myself as someone who had money. So there was no way I was gonna let myself hold onto it. And I know that sounds nuts, but I know that that's what I was doing
Emily: And I'm so glad that you're naming it too, because it's like, we spend a lot of time subconsciously playing out these patterns. And so it's like, there might be somebody listening. That's like, Oh, no, like, I don't feel that way. And it's like, well, your bank account is the evidence. And so it's like if the money hits the bank account, and then there always is some sort of financial crisis, there's always some reason that the money has to leave. There is something there, right? So it's like, either we're playing out. The abandonment over and over again, or we're playing out the fact that we don't trust ourselves with money. And because we don't trust ourselves with money, then it actually feels horribly anxiety producing to have it. So it feels better to spend it and have an empty bank account than to have it sitting there and being like, what am I gonna do with it?
Dr. Morgan: What am I gonna do with it? You know, also, so I don't reflect on this very much. I was telling Emily, it's great to be on a podcast. That's not about relationships. So, we're going places I don't usually go in my brain. But one of the things I realized too, was healing the relationship with my dad.
So, my dad had been my money model. Right? And it went horribly wrong. And he's actually great now, like a, good for him. He's on a good path, but my childhood. It was terrible. So much fear and anxiety. And I had tried so hard to be good enough for him and like, when his love and appreciation, etcetera. And I thought I could do that by earning a lot of money when it didn't change my relationship with him.
I finally confronted my dad about stuff. And finally worked through all of that. And I swear to you, that's kind of when the money stuff clicked for me, it was like, I can take my own path. I no longer have to follow the model that was given to me.
Emily: That's so beautiful. And it's really true. Everything it's so tangled together.
Right? And we can, we can choose the entry point of hiring Dr. Morgan, because we want to work on a romantic relationship. We can choose the path of hiring me because we wanna work on relationship with money. We can choose the path of hiring a nutrition coach, because we wanna work on our relationship with self and body image and food.
Ultimately, all of those paths lead to the same not, that has everything all wrapped up in it. And so it's like, I laugh sometimes in money coaching because it's like, it's all about money and not about money at all at the same time. So I love what you're mentioning there because it's like when we choose to heal anything in our lives, there's a ripple effect because it's all connected.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely.
Emily: And what a bonus, right? What an incredible bonus that you get to heal your relationship with your dad and feels part of your relationship with money like, hell yes.
Dr. Morgan: It is, It is and I, I think just adding to that, like the power to say. I can have my own path. I don't have to believe the same things my parents said about money, or I don't have to carry that same pain with me and being able to decide, okay, what do I want my relationship to be like with money?
It's a relationship just like relationships, you know, like an intimate relationship. It's a relationship. And I think once that really clicked for me too. I started to hear all the negative stuff in my head and all the lies and being able to say, wow! I wouldn't treat my worst enemy in this way. Why am I thinking this way about money?
Emily: I love that lens of a relationship cause I feel that way too. Okay, well, if I was money, what I wanna be in a relationship with me. And if the answer is no, then it's like, okay, well, what needs to change?
Dr. Morgan: And I think one of the best things I did for myself is I, I took what I know about romantic relationships and mental health and all the healing, this foundational truth. That knowledge is power and that when we have acceptance, that's how we move forward. Finally taking that and applying that to money allowed me to look at my bank accounts for the first time, like in high levels of detail, look at my student loan balances. Look at my credit cards, you know, create a plan that empowered me with money. I was in denial and numbing and shutting off from it for so long. Just pretending it wasn't there. Had to get to that place of acceptance and reality, so I can empower myself with knowledge and move forward.
Emily: So you decided to start giving your money a little attention.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: What did you find like, was it scarier than you thought it was gonna be, or was it actually more manageable?
Dr. Morgan: It was really manageable. Honestly it was way less scary than I thought. It is full of surprises though. You would think even after all, like, I mean, I've done a lot of work. I've read like 20 plus books on money mindset. I journal, I do all this stuff. There are still days when, if I look at my bank account and it's a high balance and there's a lot of money there, I feel physically uncomfortable. And I know I would have been more comfortable if it was love.
There, there are still these internal parts of me that feel uncomfortable with large amounts of money. So that surprises me just how much it's like every level has new devils, you know, the, you know, the saying like, "The more money you make, every level, you have to reprogram yourself to receive it and accept it". So I'm becoming that version of me that accepts that and says, thank you more, please. I know you talk about that, like, yes, thank you more, right? So I have to work on that. It doesn't just stop. It's a daily practice.
Emily: Well, and I'm so glad that you're speaking to this because it's not the predominant narrative. The predominant narrative is I opened my bank account and I see there's nothing there or I see it's negative and that's, what's scary. Right? And for some people that's true. And for you, that may also be true, right? It's not a one or the other.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: But what doesn't get talked about enough is, I opened my bank account and there's too much and that feels scary.
Dr. Morgan: And people from my background or I, you know, I, I don't like to compare myself. But I think coming from the scarcity that I did and then making this junk, I don't know as many people that have done it this quickly. I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but I think like, maybe for other people there's a bit more time or, or they can't break it. They can't get out of this cycle. They don't do the work. So, both are hard, both are. And it comes down to identity, right? It's like, how, how do you see yourself?
Emily: That's right. Well, and I think part of the reason that this other narrative is not predominant it's for a couple of reasons. We do know that the vast majority of people on this planet do not have surplus.
Right? So that's fact. And then because of the conditioning we have around money. That we really shouldn't talk about it that it's taboo.
Dr. Morgan: Right.
Emily: The idea of saying out loud, I have too much money in my bank account and it makes me feel uncomfortable. It sounds like the most bougie problems, pity party, like, you poor woman. That must be so hard to see too much money in your bank account. So it's like, Okay, I'm just going to talk about myself.
Dr. Morgan: Let me not talk about it. It was so interesting. As I know, I know that there were times in my life where if I had seen 5K in my bank account, I would have felt that way.
Emily: Right.
Dr. Morgan: I would have been like, oh my gosh, what should I do with this? I don't know what to do with it. It's that feeling of, oh my gosh, It's here. But I don't know what to do with it. Right? And it would create so much anxiety. So now obviously that number is a lot different where I feel that it's all about the reframe and accepting a new level.
Emily: Yes.
Dr. Morgan: I will say this one really important shift for me has been giving back and really like envisioning, how do I want to give back to people? What is the good that I'm going to do with this money? That's been more motivating than anything.
Emily: I love that. And it does, it helps change our relationship with money. You know, that we get to the more of it we have, the more good we can do. That's like such an empowering affirmation.
Dr. Morgan: Because you're like, I don't know what to do with it. Well, go build a school in Africa. You know, I don't know. There's always gonna be something when you give money to good people, there's always something good you can do with it.
Emily: Totally. So talk to me like let's catch up to more present day. What does an average month look like in your business?
Dr. Morgan: So, definitely we have ups and downs. I would say consistently doing anywhere from 30 to 50,000 in revenue.
Emily: And then do you know what cash collected looks like on a monthly basis?
Dr. Morgan: We do a lot of pay in full in my business now. So it's, it's pretty close. It's usually third, like 25-30.
Emily: Congratulations.
Dr. Morgan: Thank you. We have good profit margins. We're a very healthy business. I have cash reserves. I have a business tax account. Business savings account, payroll account, the business checking account. We are a healthy, healthy business and it feels great.
Emily: That's amazing. You're like, look at me growing up entrepreneurial work.
Dr. Morgan: I actually know what I'm doing and have separate bank accounts and have an accountant. So, Wow! Yes. It's exciting times.
Emily: That is so cool. And part of the conversation that I like to have when we're talking about numbers too, is how much you pay yourself typically, just because I think we get triggered sometimes around numbers because when people share them, they're sharing like revenue. And we sort of compare that to our net profit or what we're paying ourselves.
Dr. Morgan: So there's a misconception.
Emily: I'm sure it varies a little bit, but if you could just give us an idea.
Dr. Morgan: I probably do this differently than most people. I have a set payroll amount that I pay myself, which is 5k.
Emily: Okay.
Dr. Morgan: And then I take, owner's draws every quarter. And I, I, based that off of how profitable we've been, where all the business accounts are at, but I would say anywhere from like 25 to 30K a quarter.
Emily: I love that. And that strategy goes back to like the sophistication of your business, right? When you start working with accountants and CPAs, you know, they're gonna talk to you about like, should your business be an S-corp and if it's an S- Corp, we want you to have, you know, to have a payroll, but it can be smaller. And then you can do owner draws and so.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: I'm not an accountant, I'm not giving, like, advice around that, but if you found out that they're listening.
Dr. Morgan: I Have found that.
Emily: It's like find the people that will give you advice that's specific to your business, but the way that you have your setup Morgan is very similar to what we do as well.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely. I love that. And I think, gosh, if I'm sure you've talked about, cashflow quadrant, maybe in some episodes.
Emily: Let's talk about it. It hasn't come up yet.
Dr. Morgan: The big light bulb for me was, do you own a business or do you own a job? I have owned a job for a very long time and I'm working on owning a business, but being able to conceptualize my business as the thing that fuels my assets. My ability to acquire assets, right? So, what I have is a freedom creation accounts, which I feel like you were on the same page. And I feel so happy when I put money in that, because I know I'm investing towards assets that will allow me to have passive income in the future. So that's where I'm at financially. Now is that bigger picture of combining assets of my business.
Emiky: Yes. So let's talk a little more about that. What are you doing to grow your money or grow your net worth?
Dr. Morgan: So, I'm still in the research phase and something I have found is that there aren't many women in this space of, okay, I have money. Now, I want to buy assets. And I keep kind of trying to find the right people to connect with, to be able to do that. But it hasn't really clicked for me cause I, I would like a mentor in that space, but I feel pulled to real estate. And I know I've heard you talk about it like pros and cons. I keep coming back to real estate. I know there's a stock market.
There's other ways, but I really, I really want to own properties. So I'm still learning. And I'm hoping to make those purchases soon.
Emily: I love that. And there's so much to unpack with this. So, first off, agreed that there's not enough women in this space and it's something on my radar, is that, I really would like to start seeking out. The women who can be the experts in each of these pieces, so that I have a good referral network. Because women are rising in their wealth. And then when they're saying, "okay, now what do I do with it"? When you look at the space of wealth strategists, financial planners, stock brokers, it's so male dominated, which is okay, in the sense that like, you know, there's nothing wrong with working with a man.
However, I would love for us to have some women as options, which brings me into my next point. And that is, I'm so glad that you've been working on, in healing, your relationship with money along the way. Because I think often we use investments as a disguise for our money and trust wound. I still don't trust myself with money.
So I'm actually, I'm going to make this investment. AKA, I don't want the money in my bank account. But it sounds so good if I just give it to this stockbroker or if I just put it all in real estate, but energetically, if that investment is being done from a place of, I don't trust myself, get this money out of my account, I got news like that investment is not going to perform.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely.
Emily: As we want our investments to perform.
Dr. Morgan: And what I have found, you know, you don't want to go around saying, I've got all this money. I don't know what to do with it. Help me out. Don't just go saying that to random people. Right? So,
Emily: Totally. You'll like, you'll attract a sharp, for sure.
Dr. Morgan: And I, I've met with many sharps and I've had people want to pressure me to make decisions where I haven't felt like I have all the information and I've had to really listen to myself and say, "I don't feel educated enough". It's not a fear thing. It's, I want more information. I want to feel fully aligned and good and in control when I make these investments. So it's been, a real, I almost want to call it a spiritual journey. It feels like a spiritual journey and just learning to trust myself more.
Emily: Absolutely because ultimately, like your intuition will guide you to the right investments, right?', If you're feeling pulled to real estate, there's probably something there. And then your intuition will guide you to like the right house or the right opportunity. But you know, if you think about it, you know, billions of dollars have been made through women not trusting themselves, right? This old paradigm really is, let me convince you that you're not the right steward of your money and that I am.
And so that kind of old sales pitch. Is basically like, let me show you all the places where you're screwing up, let me show you all of your blind spots. Let me show you all of these shiny things that I'm doing so that you'll cough up your money. And so I love that you're deconditioning yourself from that. No, Thank you. I'm going to wait until this feels really good and aligned for me.
Dr. Morgan: Definitely I'm slowing down and learning to guess use that intuition. And it's, it's interesting. I think being able to be comfortable with large amounts of money in my bank account, that's been a journey in and of itself. And I know, gosh, I know that sounds privileged. And I, I am grateful that that is something I have to work on, but I have to work on it. There are days I would like to empty it and just give it all away, you know? 'cause it feels, it doesn't feel aligned on certain days. So then I really have to work on it, but I'm grateful to be where I'm at and I someday hope to help other women in this place of.
You can have it all. You can have the great relationship. You can have a great relationship with money. You can learn to have assets. You can be in control of it all. You don't have to give away your power and let other people come into your life and tell you what to do. You really can educate yourself and know what you want to do with your money.
Emily: That's right. That's right. And I just, you know what a gift that you're giving yourself. By allowing there to be a large sum of money sitting in your account. It's actually the scarier thing to do. It's the harder thing to do because you have to feel the trigger. It would be easier to dump all of it into a real estate investment. You wouldn't see it every day and your bank account?
Dr. Morgan: So true.
Emily: And so I just think it's really cool to say, like, you know, let me go slow, like, let me breathe through this. Let me sit with this. Let me anchor in this identity. There will be a time when this money gets to go off and play and grow and multiply.
Dr. Morgan: When it feels right.
Emily: And just on that point, another fear tactic that gets used all the time. Is, well, don't, you know, that money is just becoming less valuable by the day, inflation, you know, gosh, inflation now is probably 5%. So that money is just it's, you're losing money by letting it sit there. And it's like, I really had to rewrite that for myself because I have made bad investment decisions. Because, I was doing it out of lack, essentially. I was like, well, crap, this money is. It's already going down in value. So quick let me invest it. And it's like a law of attraction. I was afraid of lack. So what I got from the investment was more lack. And now I'm like, you know what? This is the cost of liquidity. The cost of liquidity, the cost of having the money right there in my bank account, I can get it out easily. I can use it for whatever I want.
Dr. Morgan: Yes.
Emily: Is the cost of inflation and I am okay with that. It's fine.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely. Absolutely. And I think you start to realize the ability to have that available to you. So that when the investment feels so aligned and feels so right, and you can jump on it, whether it is an investment to earn money or an investment in yourself or in your business to have that power and it's available to you, it's a beautiful thing.
Emily: Yes, it really is. It really is. And if that means that the money is being devalued a little bit. In order to essentially have all possibilities open to you for any type of investment, for any type of donation that you want to make. Okay.
Dr. Morgan: Exactly.
Emily: It's just like it to me, it's, it's really no different than, like other fees that we pay with money.
Dr. Morgan. Totally. I'm, I'm with you. I have heard that same. I'm sure we all have that same narrative of, your money is losing value by the second. Right? But ultimately we have to make decisions that feel aligned, that they feel good to us. And if that means I wait a little bit, I've accepted that. I'm okay with that. I used to torture myself like, okay, today you're going to make a decision. You will make an investment. I don't do that anymore. I know when it will be right. It will be right.
Emily: That's right. So I'm curious, just to kind of, like put a bow on this whole beautiful conversation in the work that you're doing with women around, you know, romantic relationships. How often do you see parallels to their relationship with money, or how often do they experience monetary gains as they heal these romantic relationships?
Dr. Morgan: I love this question. So, it's interesting. I work with a lot of people in the helping professions. A lot of them in healthcare, actually, and the paradigm there is, you know, work harder, take care of others. Don't think about yourself like other people's needs matter more. And what ends up happening is they have a really hard time receiving.
Whether it's money, love, success, they have a hard time receiving. So, what I see is that yes, when they heal their relationship with themselves, they learn how to receive that helps them in their careers. It helps them with money. I've had many clients change jobs, get a raise. Totally totally changed their relationship with money and even just allowed themselves to envision themselves as a wealthy woman that they're worthy of that.
Right? All of this comes down to self worth. Right? So, I have the self worth that I'm worthy of a great healthy relationship. It can also say I'm worthy of financial abundance and not having to worry about money. So, it's beautiful. I see it happen all the time. I'm happy. It's a great side effect of doing it.
Emily: It is. I love that so much. And I have a feeling that everyone listening, if they're not already connected with you, that you know, they're going to want to follow along. And I'll just say like, Morgan does an incredible job with the content that she puts out on social media and her podcast is fantastic. So, I highly recommend getting connected with her and following along and listening. So can you just share the best ways for people to connect with you?
Dr. Morgan: Thank you so much, Emily. Yes. So Instagram is at Dr. Morgan coaching. It's Dr. Morgan coaching. I'm on there, pretty frequently. Try to get a post out a day. And that's honestly one of my favorite ways to connect with people. I write everything. It's all me. I know other people hired out, not me. That is me speaking to you. So, connect with me on Instagram and then the podcasts. So, the let's, let's get vulnerable podcasts. We are just about to hit half a million listens right now.
Emily: Amazing.
Dr. Morgan: So exciting.
Emily: We can drop the link for that in the show notes?
Dr. Morgan: Please tune in. Thank you so much for having me.
Emily: Thank you. This was like such a fun, enlightening conversation, as you said, it's like, it's not the conversation we always have on a daily basis. So it's kind of fun to go there.
Dr. Morgan: Absolutely.
Emily: So, I just love you and appreciate you. I'm so thankful that you're on the show and to everyone listening. You know, go ahead and screenshot. As you're listening to this tag, Morgan and I let us know what your key takeaways were, what you got away from the show, and we'd love to hear from you. And on that note, we'll see you soon.
Thank you so much for listening to today's show. Changing the way we think, feel and talk about money will change the world. I truly believe that. It starts with you tuning in and it spreads when you share this show on Instagram and Facebook and tag me at EM Makes Money. And you know what moves the needle the most taking just a minute to leave a five star review on iTunes.
This show isn't free to produce. So let's multiply those dollars invested to help the show reach a bigger audience each week. Thank you so much for your help. I really appreciate it. And lastly, if you want more connection, more Em Makes Money, style, riffs, and a safe place on the internet to talk about money, jump into my free Facebook group, the money club it's linked in the show notes. Until next time I'm wishing you health, happiness, and boatloads of money.
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