Episode 2: Erasing Debt With Trust & Surrender with Guest Keri Stanley
From giving away her last $300 to manifesting $30,000 only 7 days later, our guest Keri Stanley demonstrates what it looks like to use trust and surrender to call in feminine wealth.
Follow Keri on Social:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/keri.stanley.7
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/keristanleycoaching
Work with Emily
Website: https://www.emilywilcox.com/work-with-me
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/emilyjwilcox1/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/em.makes.money
Money Wounds Quiz: https://www.emilywilcox.com/quiz
Send a DM to inquire about open coaching & masterminds or go to https://www.emilywilcox.com/products
Join our free Facebook community, The Money Club: https://www.facebook.com/groups/248672653535417
Transcript
Emily 0:03
All right, Keri Stanley, I am so thrilled to have you on the podcast today. Thank you so much for being here.
Keri 0:11
Oh, you're so welcome, Emily, I'm excited to have this conversation. I love what you're up to what you're creating and the message that you're getting out there. So I couldn't be more thrilled to support and have this conversation with you.
Emily 0:23
Yes, I am so excited to and before we dive in, I consider you a friend and a fellow like mastermind sister, but I want to make sure that our listeners know who they get the pleasure of listening to today. So Keri Stanley is the CEO of Keri Stanley coaching and inspiration. She's an inspirational speaker. As a top female life and performance coach, her passion is helping women leaders to create space to lead their lives fulfilled and on fire as they rise in their career, facilitating global retreats, online masterminds and executive leadership coaching, Keri works with leaders across the world to align their life to create the greatest impact. As a mother of teenage twin boys, a marathon runner, and a personal development junkie, Keri is always creating a life of fulfilling adventure across the globe. I love it. I love it. I love it. Yeah, you can just tell from that introduction, how much passion you have for your own life. And I know that there's going to be so much juicy stuff for us to dig into. Because any time I'm talking to someone that is self-employed that has built their own business, I just know that there were so many limiting beliefs that had to be busted along the way in order for you to get to where you are today. So let's dive right into that. Because you've shared with me a few of the limiting beliefs you had around, you know, your ability to be successful. So So tell me about those.
Keri 2:10
Yeah, I think I think the biggest thing is, is you know, when I, I'll just be, we'll just start like right in there in the moment, because when I walked away from my corporate career, I had, I had a six figure income, I was a single mom, single mom of twin boys. And that was, that was three years ago, this month that I walked away. And I knew that when I walked when I walked out the door at that moment, I knew that I was taking a massive risk, it was a leap of faith, I mean, a true leap of faith. And just to be completely authentic in terms of numbers. In that moment, the year prior, I had created $24,000 in my business $24,000. And that did not include expenses that was owned, that was revenue, like top-line revenue that was not fences. And so So I wasn't making anything that would actually sustain my family and my kids. And I, you know, I lived in a large house, that you know, all of those things. And so, so I knew that I was taking a risk, but I also knew that I was being called to it. And there was a piece of me that knew that I needed to burn the boats. And I needed to, I needed to jump off the cliff. And I needed to build the parachute on the way down. And I knew I was walking into something that was going to be a stretch for me. And so it was, it was that piece of it. And part of what had delayed me for so long was that I grew up in a family. And if you look at the lineage of my family, there actually is entrepreneurs in my family. However, they were always the men. And they were always supported by the women. So the women made the money, the women held everything down. So you had a choice, you could follow your passion, and have someone else support you and be happy and all of those things, or you could be the workhorse and bring home the money and support and all of that. And traditionally, the role was that the women supported and the men, you know, had the passion and the freedom and all of that, but they didn't come as one. So I was the first female in the family that wasn't with a partner at the time. That was because I've gone through a divorce and so it was me melding into one person that was standing for I can create it all. And family was nervous as hell, like, just nervous as nervous as nervous because they hadn't seen it before. And so I like my mom, one of the first things she said was like, Oh my gosh, what are you going to do about health insurance? You know, all the questions that come up. Yeah. So so I had to get over that I was doing something a new way that there was resources out there that I couldn't look at the past. And so that was one of the most, one of the biggest limiting beliefs that I got to get over. And then the other thing was just the fact that I come from small town, Missouri, you know, I come from a town of, you know, the Midwest or its farmers where it's, you know, blue collar. And so I was not raised in a community of, you know, creative entrepreneurs living in this type of a of a life. And it was a town of 900 people, you know, so what I was exposed to was not what I was stepping into. So I constantly was having to say, like, I'm creating something new, that just hasn't been my normal day to day exposure, but I still get to follow my intuition. Ooh,
Emily 5:54
I love that. And I can relate so much to your story. You know, I grew up in a very small town in Michigan, very blue collar. I also three years ago, this month, left corporate America last anniversaries. Yes. And, you know, I had $150,000 a year job with all the perks, the car, the 401k, yada, yada, yada on and it felt scary as hell. And I did have a partner. Now granted, we were both stepping into entrepreneurship. But I can also relate to what you're saying about your family being worried. And my family kind of felt that same way. And it's a struggle when you feel still a little shaky, and your decision, and then the people who love you and are around you feel very shaky in your decision. So it sounds like you really had to call in some next-level trust in yourself.
Keri 7:01
Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah. One of the biggest things, one of the two smartest things I would say that I did. One is I surrounded myself with a community of people that had gone before me. So I was very I let my family know what I was doing. But they weren't my sounding boards when I was making decision. Yeah, they were they were my informants after the fact, when I could stand in that the decision so that they could feel the confidence in me. Yeah, shakiness, went to the people that had been in the situation before. So that was one of the smartest things for me to do. The second thing for me to do was I at the moment that I turned in my resignation, because my resignation was based off of a sign that I had received from God that it was time to leap that I like it was a clear time to like cut the ties and go. And so I knew in that moment, and committed in that moment, to have my strongest spiritual relationship with God grounded in anything that I had ever had. And so I made my spiritual life a commitment and a priority, in a way I had never done before. Because I knew like I knew, like I knew we were going to walk through some stuff. And if I didn't have that, I knew I'd give up on myself. Yeah, those were the two things that I committed to that I stood on that no matter how bad it got, no matter how scary it got, those were the two places that I always went first, they became my anchors. And they they are what kept me going.
Emily 8:36
I love that. Yeah. And when you were surrounding yourself with people who had gone before you, was that through like a paid mastermind, or paid coaching, or was it just a curated network?
Keri 8:50
Both? Both. Okay, so I had, so I had a business coach with masterminds. People like you, you know, because there was a few stages where I was in a couple different communities. So that that I was surrounded with but also I had communities that stayed in contact with that was the curated network, and, and even other people that I met, like, I started calling in more and more people that were either supporting my vision or had been there before, and that I could be authentic with and say, you know, if I was in a mess, and here's what it was, I had so many people say, Oh, I've been there. It's really not as bad as you think it may feel really bad, but it's really not as bad as you think I've been there. Keep going. I know what you're doing, you know, so that just became critical. So it was both I had paid and unpaid.
Emily 9:38
Yeah. So the year prior, your business had brought in $24,000. total gross revenue. You left your job in March. What did that first year of full-time entrepreneurship look like?
Keri 9:59
Yeah, so that first year I ended up creating, right at 75,000. So, so I went from 2024 25,000 to 75,000, that first year. And I still, I still had for the first part of it, I still had a little bit of, you know, comfort because I still had my, the first few months of the year still had my six-figure income coming in. And then I had and then I had another three to four months where I was still getting paid out some. So So overall, I still was landing about the same as where I had been. And I'll be honest, I was already in quite a bit of debt because of investing that I had made before. So what happened for me was all of that caught up to me on year two. Okay, that's where it really caught up. So year two was definitely my, my most difficult year, which would have been 2000, which would have been 2019, like the fall of 2019, part of 2020. And I remember two real critical moments, two real critical moments. One was, one was it was, I remember, it was like October, and I just, I had had a day where I was like, I don't know that things couldn't get any worse. You know, my kids were eating peanut butter and jelly. It was wondering, I've never been in that situation where you're wondering, like, if any money's going to come in whatsoever? How am I going to pay for the gas bill, the electric bill, the groceries, the all of those things. And I just kept going, kept going, kept going. And I was dealing with, you know, overdraft accounts, which I'd never had in my entire life, just like all of that was happening. And there was a moment where the day before, I'll tell you a quick spiritual conversation the day before I was like, I don't know that I can take much more. And God spoke to me very clearly and said, I need you to go like he actually sent me to a church that day. And it was in the afternoon was a Friday afternoon. And when I went there, I just followed it wasn't even it wasn't even a church. I didn't go to a physical church at that time. And I didn't understand why it was going. But I just followed because I was in that pit, you know, that pit where you're just like, I don't know what else to do. And I'm hearing that sounds crazy, but I'm gonna go. And long story short, I went in and it was, you know, as a Friday afternoon, I go in hardly anybody's there. I went into the sanctuary, it was a new building that had been built, and it was pitch black. I mean, like pitch black, I couldn't see anything. And the people that were there, they didn't offer to turn the lights on. For me. i It was a big auditorium. I didn't know where the lights were. And so I just like I stood there at the doorway of this gigantic black auditorium. And right when I was standing there, I just was like, gosh, do I find the lights, and I hear this voice. It was like a whisper, internal voice for me that just said, leaves the lights off, leaves the lights off. And so I started walking in the dark, and I turned on the little flashlight in my phone. So I could see. And I started taking a step. And then another step. And all I could see was one step at a time. And as I made my way to the front, I thought I was gonna sit down and like the front row of the congregation. But I was I felt led to just go up the stairs and then go sit on the stage and look out. And I just heard this voice say, this is where you are right now. You feel like you're in the dark, you feel like you can't see anything, you're lost. And you're like looking for the lights. All you need is this amount of light to see one step at a time. I just need you to keep going. Because what I'm building for you is this, this new building that was just built is exactly what I'm building in the world for you. You're exactly where you're meant to be. You only need to see one step. But we're getting ready to fill the seats for you. You're getting ready to speak on international stages. It's all being built for you while I'm building you while I'm building you. And so everything got stripped away so that I can no longer depend on the things that I was clinging to for safety. And so I just got asked, Can you trust me? And so I remember just like bawling and being like okay, I'll keep going I trust you. I don't get it. You know, all of that. But the very next day, all my bank accounts got shut down.
All of them. And I just was like, Okay, I literally had I mean I fell to the floor. I literally was at this point that I was like I've got nothing everything's been shut down. I didn't have access to anything And I had one account, one account that still had, it was like it was like in kind of like a site account. And it had $300 in it. And I sat there, and I was like, What do I do now? What do I do now? And like some people are driven by intense amounts of pain, and that has them actually, like really get into movement. I'm one of those people that have a lesson in life of like, really hard lessons, get me into action if I'm not paying attention. And so, in that moment, it was a choice. It was a 2 am prayer, it was a like, where do I go now. And I got, I got the clear message to give away my last $300. Because I was, I was needing $3,000 for a deposit for something for clients that had to happen in like five days after that. And so what I was asked at that moment was that you've turned everything over to me, everything over except for your finances, was still holding so tight, because I was so scared of the finances, that that was the one area hadn't fully surrendered. And so I was asked to give away my last $300. And I like, I remember hitting the button on the computer that night, and being bold enough. And I think this is incredibly important to stand in your vision and boldly ask and declare what you're ready to receive. And I only asked for giving and giving away this last $300, let it serve, I am unattached I'm releasing it, I'm trusting in my abundance. And instead of asking for $3,000, in return, I'm asking for 30,000 In return, boldly asked for a 100% return. And when I asked for that, I just was like, just all in I mean, you're at the point you're at the breaking point of all in. And if I wouldn't have gotten the message the day before that day, I would have given up guarantee, yeah, guarantee.
Unknown Speaker 17:10
So seven days later, I had $30,000 in my bank account.
Keri 17:17
Wow, seven days later, I created $30,000 in cash. Because I asked for it, I stood I listened, I surrendered. And then I opened the door. And I tell people all the time, we have a closed door on our business, a closed sign on our business. And I opened and received and stood for it being possible. And pressure. And I just said it's go time, like there's no other choice at this moment other than going back to my job. And I knew that wasn't the that's not what I was being led to. So that was like one of the most critical moments of I can do this.
Emily 17:54
Wow. That is such a powerful story. And that is some next level trust. Like if that were being whispered in my ear, I don't know if I would have listened. Maybe now. But I always say that that spirit whispers then shouts and then gives you the two by four upside the head. And so I try to listen to that. Because I don't like the two-by-four. But that is incredible that you listen, and I've heard I think it was actually James Wedmore. Talk about this before, where he says, you know, if you're down to your last $500, what should you do? And he says, give it away? Because what would an abundant person do? Absolutely. If you want to be that version of yourself that's wealthy and where $300 is nothing. Then you give it away and you act as if you already are that person. Yeah. Yeah. But then you also take aligned action, which you did, right, the action of giving away the money, but then also, I imagine you were showing up in your business.
Keri 19:18
Absolutely. I was in committed action for the next Yes, days. And I had I had, I had clients show up. And I had clients that I attracted in by how I was showing up reaching out all of those things. So all that worked, so I didn't just sit on my couch and meditate for the rest of the seven days. But I stood in it. I released it. And I was unattached to how and where it came in. And I think that's incredibly important. I wouldn't put all the pressure on this one client or whatever. And I just I just opened it up and said it's go time. Yeah, yes.
Emily 19:57
Yeah. And what you were just saying about being unattached. To the how, that's something really important that I want to be a part of these discussions around money. Because often, we come at money from the wounded masculine energy of, I need it to be this, I'm in, I need to feel like I have control. So the money is going to come to me this way from this many clients that pay me this much. And the Divine Feminine says, I trust I surrender the how I will show up inspired and passionate and creative, and I'll do my piece, but I'm willing to relinquish the the how it all comes back to me. Mm hmm. Right. So you're obviously in a different place now than you were then? Um, how do you tell me what it looks like now this relationship with God, this willingness to stand in your divine feminine, and allow your business to grow in sort of magic and miraculous ways?
Keri 21:13
Mm hmm. Yeah, I think the biggest thing is, is that that we continue to build our intuition and our receiving muscles over time. And so the littlest whispers, when you start following them, then what happens is, is that every time you listen and follow, what what I see is that God is saying, You are following so now I can trust you with even bigger things. And so we're getting tested all the time with what are we listening to? What are we willing to follow? I just had just the other day. I mean, it sounds like the simplest thing, but I just had, I was doing a meditation. And I felt this, like, I felt this whisper come through that said, take your coffeemaker and put it underneath your cabinet. Like, stop coffee for right now. And, and I had a cup of coffee sitting next to me. And I was like, did I really just hear this? No, I mean, that's just coffee, right? And so um, so I put it away, I poured my coffee out, I put it away. And I followed for like six or seven days. And then after that, I started telling myself a story of like, oh, that's long enough. Like, it's no big deal. And every time I went to make the coffee for the next few days, every morning, I would hear this voice be like, are we listening? Or are we not listening? Like, you know, are you are you we've built up this relationship of faith and trust. Interesting that you're choosing not to follow right now. You know, so. So it sounds like such the smallest things. But what happened was, I put the coffeemaker back on there, after a few days of being out of integrity with my faith, I put the coffee maker back under and was like, I don't understand it, but I'm trusting it. And I just got this clear message that was that was you don't see, again, kind of back to the steps. You don't see what this is connected to. But I can trust me and other stuff. Can you just trust me with the coffee. And what was really interesting was, it was 21 days that it was so crystal clear of having no coffee. And after the 21 days were up, there was just a day that there was no energy around coffee again. And I knew that I was okay to have it. But what was really interesting is as I had a couple really big health moments come up during that time, so I could see it. Yeah. And so it was calling me to listen to my body. Yeah, and the coffee was covering up some of it. And so so there was something that I was really needing to listen to that was unlike, you know, the iceberg. Yeah, grams that you see, there was something underneath that was affecting my vision that was affecting me creating what I was being asked to recreate that needed to surface for me to handle it. And it and it surfaced during that time. And so So again, the two by four, that's the two by four came in, and that time for something. And so so now it's being handled, it's been talking to me for years, but it's it is a daily practice of listening even when you don't understand it doesn't make sense. And so I tune in every single day it is a practice of tuning in and following all of the time. It has become something second nature to me, I don't second guess it anymore. I may resist it every once while like I did with the coffee, but But it it drives my business. It drives what I do, it drives everything. And even for my business right before COVID hit, I was doing journaling and you know listening in and I actually was given the message to stop all travel to move my business locally to focus on my family. And so even before COVID hit I had already set up my calendar my events, everything to be in to be COVID. Friendly, because it guided me to that before it ever happened. Yeah. And so that relationship, that level of trust creates your abundance. It's freedom. And so it's really just about following that.
Emily 25:19
Yeah, absolutely. And, you know, I always say that the universe gives us the breadcrumb trail. Just like you were saying that one step at a time. And it's true, because our ego would get in the way, if we could see the big picture. We would screw it up somehow. And so we're just given that next step, that next step, and it's part of this playfulness, and it's part of us stepping into our highest self and CO creating, that we can be in that level of trust. And you're absolutely right. It's it often feels like small, silly things, or things that are totally unrelated. Or things that seemingly feel counterproductive to growing the business. Are you know that so? Well, I, yeah, I've like I've like really gotten the feeling and the urge and the energy to like, reorganize my kitchen. And it's like, well, this doesn't mean yeah, it's gonna be nice. It doesn't feel like it's gonna grow my business. And then it's not until later, then you can see oh, okay, that actually didn't play a role. How interesting. But when we allow ourselves to be in that relationship, it gets to feel so fun and playful. And we get to be surprised and delighted by our own business, and by the outcomes of our own business.
Keri 27:00
Yeah, absolutely. And it's so fun, because we used to, it's so fun when you can release and allow yourself to be in the play of surprise. Yeah. Because so often we're controlling the way it's going to come in what it's going to look like all of those things. So we keep things out. Because we're trying to protect, we're trying to keep things in the box. So when we allow ourselves to step into, it's always for our highest good, even when it's messy, that I get surprised. And i In the end, the universe loves to delight us universe, to surprise us. And we allow for that things can happen in such magical ways, and far better than we could have ever planned it. But we've got to surrender and trust in that. And that's usually the muscle that we have to start building and walking through. And sometimes they're tough lessons to learn. But it always ends up playing out way better than you ever could have ever could have imagined. Yeah, one of the things that you were talking about is revealing that next step, and I heard something the other day that I was like it's so it rang so true, that you are you're either shown the mountain tap or the next step on the trail. Never both. And a lot of times, I am shown the mountain top. And so then I'll be like, how the heck do I build to get into the month? Like you've shown me this gigantic thing, but I don't know how to get there. And so that made so much sense to me. Because some people it's revealed to them as the next step on the trail. Some people it's revealed as the mountain top, both of them are going to require a level of trust, but which trust is it for you that you get to sink into so many times I'm not revealed the next step. I get to trust myself to take the step. The mountaintops already there, I can see it and that no matter what step I take, it's the right step. Yeah, you the universe already has that handle. So other people are they get to trust themselves to take that step and not need to know where it's leading. Right. Everyone you are you're one of the two is showing up for you and your discount again, regardless, but I loved that analogy of it's either the mountain top or the next step one or the other. Both of them are at the same place.
Emily 29:11
Yeah, I love that too. And it's been such a shift in my own business to appreciate and have the entire outcome of the action. Be I listened and allow that to be enough. Right. I followed the instruction. I did what felt good in that moment. Period. Not I did it now. Where's the result? Yes, I did it Now was it actually the right thing? And it just feels so good to be in a place where there is no second-guessing. And it's not a quid pro quo type of relationship. Hmm, it's like, you know what, I got the inspiration, I felt the intuitional hit. And so I did it. That's it. I'm so happy. I'm so happy that I did it, even though I was scared or even though I have no idea how it's actually going to benefit me.
